


Lie To Me

by sparkleseungs



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, M/M, New Year's Eve, Tears
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-12
Updated: 2019-03-14
Packaged: 2019-10-08 21:48:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17394290
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sparkleseungs/pseuds/sparkleseungs
Summary: Hyunjin just couldn't seem to forget about Felix Lee.





	1. 8.52pm

**Author's Note:**

> hello!!! welcome to my second stray kids au!!!! if you havent done so, please do check out my first one (minsung) called i hate being asian! id really appreciate the hits and kudos :) this au was inspired by lie to me by 5 seconds of summer! so i do recommend giving the song a quick listen before reading to give yourself a little context on the au on whole. anywho.. without further ado, heres the first chapter of my hyunlix au :)))

_ “Now i wish we never met, cause you’re too hard to forget.” _

 

_ “I know that you don’t but if i ask you if you love me, i hope you lie to me.” _

 

_ Lie to me - 5 Seconds of Summer _

 

_ 8:52 pm  _

 

 Hyunjin wanted nothing more than to leave. It was New Year, and he was stuck at a party for a countdown. With a cup of beer that was shoved into his hand the moment he stepped in, Hyunjin stood at the side of the biggest room in that damned house.

 

 Just thinking. 

 

 Mindless pop music was pounding in his eardrums, alongside the flashing lights in the club-like room, only making Hyunjin’s head throb further and his vision blur. Couples were shamelessly making out against every single solid object they could lay their eyes on.  Walls, couches, each other, anything. 

 

A pang of nostalgia echoed throughout Hyunjin’s body, so he let his head turn away and face his half-empty cup of beer. The slightly cool liquid swirled in the cup as if mocking his lack of love in his life. 

 

 It had been 6 months. 6 months since the breakup. 6 months since the last time Hyunjin had seen, touched, kissed and felt Felix Lee. 

 

 6 painful months of tears, sobs, screaming, denial and finished tubs of ice cream. 6 months without Felix Lee. 

 

 Breakups were always painful, it wasn’t a new feeling to Hyunjin; he had gone through a handful of them as he breezed through his teenage years. But why was this one so painful? 

 

 What made Felix Lee so special? 

 

 It was probably because Hyunjin didn’t expect it at all. It came at him out of nowhere. He had no time to prepare before Felix dropped the bomb on him one night as they were cuddling, watching their favourite movie. 

 

 Hyunjin’s hand was fitted on Felix’s waist, just above the area of bare skin that had been exposed after Felix’s shirt had ridden up. His thumb rubbed slowly comforting circles over and over again like he always did whenever the two cuddled. Felix’s warm breath dusted over Hyunjin’s collarbone everytime he exhaled, and snuggled further into his chest. 

 

 Hyunjin never wanted that moment to end, until Felix opened his mouth.

 

 “Hyunjin,”

 

 Pulling away from Hyunjin slowly, then came the blow. 

 

_ “I can’t do this anymore.” _

 

 It cut through his skin like a knife slicing through paper, but all he could do at that point was let a tear slip out of his eye. 

 

 The scene was replayed over and over in his head, playing a sick joke on the poor boy and now all he wanted to do was to crawl into a hole and die a thousand deaths. 

 

 Questions rushed to his head instantly and he reached out for the boy; to hold his hand, kiss his cheek, caress over the tiny array of freckles Felix had on his cheeks anything really, but Felix pulled back. 

 

 Hyunjin knew. 

 

 _Felix had moved on._ _He had fallen out of it. He had fallen out of love with Hwang Hyunjin._

 

 Moved on from boring old’ Hyunjin who did nothing but treat him like an absolute prince when they were together. 

 

 That night was the first time they would be in the same room or house since then. Hyunjin almost chickened out that night, but Minho forced every fibre of his being to be there, at least for the countdown. But there he was, hours before midnight. 

 

 Hoping from the bottom of his heart that Felix wouldn’t be there, Hyunjin chugged the rest of his beer down. 

 

 “Hey, Hyunjin!!” 

 

 Speaking of the devil, there Minho was.

 

 Hyunjin turned just in time for an intoxicated body to slam into him. A wave of alcohol invaded his nostrils as he caught the heavy body.

 

 Lee Minho. The one and only owner of the house, and Hyunjin’s best friend. 

 

 “Hey Minho, how much have you drank? You smell disgusting.”

 

 Shrugging his shoulders, Minho gave him a dazed half smile and leaned more on Hyunjin, his face dangerously close to Hyunjin’s, “Like eleventeen.”

 

 Of course, Minho had taken the liberty of downing everything on sight. Minho was drunk off his ass and the night had barely begun. 

 

 “C’mon bro, let me get you a refill on that drink, it looks like you need one.”

 

 Minho swayed from side to side, and Hyunjin had to support almost half his weight. 

 

 But whatever Minho said, despite his drunk-assed antics, made sense. 

 

 He needed to loosen up, have fun, maybe take someone home. Anything to take his mind of  _ him _ . 

 

 Hyunjin downed the rest of his beer in one long gulp. 

 

 “Hit me.” 

 

 The night had only just begun. 


	2. 10.12pm

 

__   Hyunjin had forgotten how many shots he had downed. 5? Maybe 6. But his tolerance was high enough for him to not feel much, nonetheless, his hands shook and his face buzzed from the alcohol running through his veins.

 

 He felt like he was merely a piece in that gigantic puzzle. 

 

 The party was still going as strong as ever, the music never died and the people never left. Hyunjin no longer felt as out-of-place in the room, and now blended in with the blurred crowd with the help of the alcohol.

 

 A couple of hi-bye friends waved over upon realizing the presence of the boy, chorusing incoherent greetings, and even slapping him on the back. Hyunjin nearly spilt his drink on the ground. 

 

 It didn’t matter, it only encouraged him to fill it up with more. 

 

 He was currently grinding against a stranger mindlessly to another one of those EDM songs that blared in the background, drowning out the rest of the toxic voices the drinks had failed to silence. With his hands on his waist and his sprinkled on his shoulders, sweat coated their bodies as they grooved to beats.

 

 Hyunjin had barely caught his name, it was tangled up in the volume of the music that blasted all around them, but it hardly mattered to him. It was someone who could attempt to help him get over a certain freckled boy. 

 

 And there Hyunjin was, in his full form; dancing. He loved dancing- it was one of the only things that he had a true passion for. It was like breathing, he couldn't live without it. 

 

 He remembered the days where he’d spend hours learning random Kpop dances online with Felix in the middle of his living room at 2 am in the morning, because why not right? 

 

 They never learnt anything past the chorus, they’d both end up on the floor laughing and shushing each other incessantly, but Hyunjin didn’t want anything less. 

 

 He even got a black eye from it. 

 

 Damn, he missed that more than he cared to admit. 

 

 Hyunjin hadn’t seen Felix all night; he wasn’t sure if it was a good or bad thing, but he saw the glass half-full. 

 

 He knew Felix was there, it was impossible to miss the abundance of Instagram updates Felix had plastered on every single social media platform, just to let everyone know he was there. 

 

 Hyunjin wanted to block him, he really did. He had caught himself multiple times just hovering over the button, one click away from cutting Felix out of his life completely. but he could never bring himself to do it. 

 

 In the heat of the moment, instead of forgetting about Felix, and dancing with someone else, all Hyunjin could think about was Felix. 

 

 The memory of when the first time he and Felix had danced like this at a party just like this a couple years back. It was a long time ago, but the memory was fresh in Hyunjin’s head. He could never forget. 

 

 Felix’s left hand would always be looped around the older’s neck, gripping tightly on his collar to make Hyunjin look into his deep brown eyes. He would then plant his plump lips on the spot on Hyunjin’s neck that Felix knew drove him crazy.

 

 Faint magenta bruises would trail up from Hyunjin’s neck all the way to his jawline, aligned with a trial of destruction following Felix’s lips. 

 

 They spent last new years together, in the exact same house on the exact same dance floor, just basking in the presence of the other. 

 

 And then Hyunjin wasn’t with the stranger anymore. He and along with the people around him disappeared, swallowed by the house itself, leaving Hyunjin alone on the dance floor. 

 

 Hyunjin was transported back to the place he knew like the back of his palm. Like it was only yesterday. He was at the front door of a house he once called home.

 

 His feet had a mind of its own and brought him right to the doorstep of the house. Without any further thought, his palm wrapped around the cool metal doorknob and pushed it open. 

 

 Everything was as how Hyunjin had left it. The last time he was in this house before everything fell apart. 

 

 Bringing a hand up to his head Hyunjin’s eyes tried to focus on the familiarity that laid before him. He blinked a couple times, and rubbed his eyes vigorously as if the scene before him would change overnight.

 

_  It couldn’t be.  _


	3. 10.41pm

 

 

 

__ There seemed to be no one there. 

 

 “Hello?” Hyunjin called out unsurely and paused to wait for a response. 

 

 None came.

 

 After hesitating for a couple of moment, Hyunjin let the name that had been floating in his head for the past half year to ring.

 

 “Felix?”

 

 Still, no response came. 

 

 It was Felix’s apartment, but Felix was nowhere to be found. 

 

 To his left was a couch with blankets and pillows strewn haphazardly. 

 

_ “God damn it why do you have to get such a heavy couch.” Hyunjin groaned “Are you even pushing?” _

 

_  “I am pushing, you dick,”  _

 

_  “Our neighbours are gonna complain about the noise we’re making at 2.30am in the morning,” Hyunjin turned his head to face the love of his life.  _

 

_  “Then let them complain.” _

 

_  “This was your brilliant idea, right? Which person in the right frame of mind would suddenly decide to learn the dance to Fire at 2 fucking am in the morning.” _

 

_  “This is a great idea Hyung, you’ll see.” Felix’s cheeks pinked. _

 

_  Felix ended up smacking Hyunjin in the face minutes after.  _

 

_  “Oh my god, I’m so sorry hyung,” Felix pressed an ice pack to Hyunjin’s eye that was beginning to bruise. _

 

_  “Ahh, softer please” Hyunjin hissed. _

 

_  “Sorry.” _

 

_  After a brief silence, Hyunjin let out a low rumble from his chest. It was hard to stay mad at him when he was so cute.  _

 

_  “I told you it was a bad idea right.” Hyunjin, despite his eye, chuckled and clasped onto Felix’s free hand.  _

 

_  Felix’s hands were always so soft and warm.  _

 

_  He refused to make eye contact with Hyunjin initially and hid his face into his shirt. A pair of fingers made the boy look back into Hyunjin’s eyes once again.  _

 

_  Cocking his head towards the boy, Hyunjin gave an arrogant smile and licked his lips.  _

 

_  “What am i gonna do with you huh Felix?” _

 

_  Giggling, the boy kissed Hyunjin’s cheek and mumbled shyly, “I love you,” _

 

_  “I love you too dumbass.” _

 

__ Blinking the tears that had formed in his eyes, Hyunjin turned his head away to face the kitchen. 

 

__ Straight ahead was the kitchen counter he was so familiar with. 

 

_ “Hyunjin, I’m supposed to be at work in 15 minutes…” The blond haired boy giggled under his breath. _

 

_  Hyunjin gripped the bottom of the boy’s thighs and lifted him up the cool marble top. Upon doing so, the stack of papers that was placed neatly toppled over. _

 

_  “Hey… I need that for work later…” Felix whined, tugging on Hyunjin’s sleeve. _

 

_  Hyunjin was in between the boys’ legs with his hands fastened around his thighs, staring into his eyes’ lovingly. Hyunjin could never get sick of his eyes.  _

 

_  Felix’s hands were flirting with the edges of Hyunjin’s cotton shirt and avoiding his eyes. Hyunjin used the tip of his fingers to lift his chin up to make him look at him.  _

 

_  Hyunjin remembered that exact moment they made eye contact.  _

 

_  “I’m gonna be late.” _

 

_  “Be late then,” Hyunjin mumbled before sealing their lips together.  _

 

__ Hyunjin padded past the counter to stand right in front of the stove he made breakfast at countless of times. 

 

 Running his fingers over the ash-covered stove, he let his memories wander once again. 

 

_ “You’re up early,” Familiar arms wrapped itself around Hyunjin’s torso.  _

 

_  “I couldn’t sleep, so I thought I’d make us some breakfast.”  _

 

_  “I’m surprised you know where everything is.”  _

 

_  “Hey! I managed okay. I’m not totally lost in your kitchen.”  _

 

_  Hyunjin’s hand moved to ruffle the boy’s already messy hair even further, earning him a light chuckle.  _

 

_  The smell of fresh waffles wafted in the boy’s nose. Snuggling closer into Hyunjin, he breathed in with a smile on his face.  _

 

_  “Thanks, hyung.”  _

 

__ Tears had begun to slide down Hyunjin’s pale cheeks, and this time he didn’t try to stop them. 

 

 He walked over to the staircase. Staring longingly at it, his fingers slid over the railings, as he did with the stove. Over and over again. 

 

 Hyunjin soon found himself staring at himself in the mirror of the bathroom. 

 

 Was this even real? What was reality? 

 

 Hyunjin let his fingers card through his sweaty hair; a habit he had cultivated over the years of frustration. 

 

 In the midst of it, his gaze drifted to the cup that laid on the sink. 

 

_ Hyunjin’s toothbrush was still there.  _

 

__ And that was when he unravelled. 

 

_ “Hyunjin? What happened?”  _

 

_  Hyunjin slumped down to his knees, holding his face in his hands because there was nothing else he could have done at that moment. _

 

_  Felix ran, ran all the way to Hyunjin and cupped his pale cheeks in his hands, to try and fix his broken pieces back together.  _

 

_  Hyunjin was usually so put together and strong, and then he lay broken. _

 

_  “I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know.” Hyunjin rambled like a broken record. “Everything’s just falling apart so fast and i can’t do anything about it.”  _

 

_  “I’m here, okay?” _

 

_  Hyunjin buried his head into the boy’s chest and let all his emotions and worries spill onto his shirt.  _

 

_  “I can just never be good enough for myself. I can never be enough. Why can’t i be enough?”  _

 

_  “You’re enough. You’re enough for me. You’ll always be enough for me, Hyunjin.” _

 

_  Hyunjin’s taller frame was engulfed by the smaller boy as he fell to his bruised knees with a soft thump.  _

 

__ “Felix…” Hyunjin’s cracked voice muttered without thinking twice. 

 

__ Hyunjin had bottled up his feelings for far too long. Once the first tear fell, the rest followed in suit and there was nothing he could have done to prevent anything else from happening.

 

 Turning around in a 360 angle, Hyunjin took a  moment to just look at the memories he and Felix shared that engraved into every single piece of furniture in the house. Every single place and item played a part in solidifying the beautiful times he had with Felix. 

 Suddenly, everything began to turn to dust and faded into the air. Hyunjin jumped and reached his hand out to reach for Felix, like once before. 

 

  And once again, Felix had slipped through his fingers and away from him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> asknlsdjdsjkfs im so sorry this update took such a long time !! i had a lot of work and this super bad writers block sdjfbs. thank you to everyone who left kudos hehe stay tuned for the next chapter !!


	4. 11.25pm

_ “Felix, please don’t leave again.” _

 

 “Sorry who?” 

 

 Snapping back into reality, Hyunjin was back at the party, face to face with the stranger who crossed his eyes in confusion. 

 

_  Felix was gone.  _

 

__ Hyunjin was no longer at Felix’s apartment, but at the stupid New Year’s Party, he suddenly dreaded being at.

 

 Before the stranger could say anything else, Hyunjin beat him to him.

 

 “I’m sorry, I-” Hyunjin’s throat was beginning to choke up, “ I need to go.”

 

 And Hyunjin dashed up the stairs two at a time, away from whatever had just happened. 

 

__ Hyunjin found himself standing in front of the mirror. With less than an hour to midnight, a lone tear slipped down his blotchy cheek and dropped in the sink. His knuckles turned white from the strength he had been using to grip the edge of the sink, digging his fingernails into the marble. To make himself feel something. 

 

_  Anything.  _

 

 Breathing deep, Hyunjin tried anything to catch his breath after witnessing that mind-boggling scene in his head. He had no idea what the hell just happened. All he was doing was dancing with a stranger, trying to have the time of his life on New Year’s Eve when flashbacks of Felix flooded his entire nervous system. 

 

 Hyunjin hadn't seen in so long, hadn't felt his presence, in so long, but it felt like it was only yesterday when his lips were pressed against his. 

 

 “You’re okay Hyunjin, You’re okay.” He repeated again and again and again, the grip on the sink getting tighter by the second. 

 

 It was then when Hyunjin regretted not listening to his therapist about the deep breathing and counting to ten, or some shit like that, he didn't know. 

 

 Hyunjin looked in the mirror and couldn’t believe the person staring right back at him, was none other than himself. 

 

 He looked washed out, sucked out of all the life he had a mere 6 months ago. Cheeks sunken in, 

 

 A brash chorus of knocks came ringing in Hyunjin’s ear, followed by the impatient twists and turns of the already locked door. 

 

 “Occupied!” Hyunjin managed to scream back through his panicked breathing. 

 

 “Hyunjin.” A familiar voice sounded out. It was slightly muffled, but Hyunjin instantly recognised the voice. 

 

 A sigh was breathed out upon the silence Hyunjin unintentionally gave. 

 

 “It’s me, Felix.”

 

 Obviously, Hyunjin knew it was Felix, but maybe, just maybe if he just blocked everything out and stayed silent, Felix would eventually just leave.

 

 Like he always did. 

 

 “I’m not leaving until you open this door.”

 

 Hyunjin’s breath had steadied a couple minutes ago, and now he was left to pacing silently from the door to the bathtub, then back to the door, while biting his cheek raw. The familiar taste of metal in his mouth woke him up from his train of thought.

 

 He had to make a decision. Now. 

 

  Hyunjin was finally going to see the boy who broke his heart six months ago for the first time in forever. 

 

 There was absolutely nothing to worry about. 

 

 So he grabbed the doorknob with sweaty palms, turned, and pulled. 

 

 There he was. 

 


	5. 11.46pm

 

  Sometimes, Hyunjin wondered why the hell Felix stayed single after they broke up. He was the one who did it anyway, right?

 

 But in fact, he rejected the other people, men and women alike and opted for solitude. 

 

 Why? Was he just so sick and tired of Hyunjin that he tainted all relationship experience with anyone else? Was Hyunjin such a horrible boyfriend? 

 

 Shifting his weight from side to side, Hyunjin averted Felix’s piercing gaze and opted to look at his black combat boots instead. Chewing on his bottom lip only intensified the taste of blood in his mouth. 

 

__ Felix had never looked better. Hyunjin already knew that. But what caught his attention was the denim jacket he was wearing. Hyunjin’s denim jacket, to be exact. It was the jacket he had gifted Felix on their one-year anniversary. It was initially his own, but Felix kept “borrowing” it so Hyunjin eventually just gave it to him. 

 

 The jacket swallowed Felix whole, Hyunjin remembered how cute he looked in his clothing. 

 

_ I can’t believe he kept it.  _

 

__ “Felix.” Hyunjin breathed, after a long pause. 

 

 “You look good,” Hyunjin stated in a matter of fact manner. 

 

 He did. A light healthy pink dusted his cheeks and there lay his familiar freckles that dotted the bridge of his nose and the bottom of his eyes. They were faint, probably from the alcohol Hyunjin had consumed, but nonetheless were there. 

 

 “Thanks.” 

 

 There was that smile Hyunjin loved. 

 

 I-I,” Felix brought a hand to card his fingers through his blond locks, a habit Hyunjin knew meant Felix was nervous, “saw you bolt up here, so i thought I’d check up on you, that’s all.”

 

 Oh. 

 

 “Why do you care?” Hyunjin’s lack of a filter began to expose the thoughts that had been floating in his head for the past 6 months. 

 

 “What?”

 

 “Why do you care? We broke up Felix.” Hyunjin droned. 

 

 “Doesn’t mean i still don't care about you.” 

 

 “Then why did you do it?”

 

 “I,”

 

 “Why did you break up with me?”

 

 Upon Felix’s silence, Hyunjin took the liberty to slap him in the face with insults one after another. He gave Felix no time to react or protect himself against them. All Felix could do was take whatever was coming at him with clenched fists, because everything he said was nothing further from the truth. 

 

 “Was it because i was a horrible boyfriend? Did i not spend enough time with you? Did i not treat you like a prince? Did i not give you every bit of love i could give? Were you not happy with me?”

 

_  Was i not enough for you Felix? _

 

 “You wer-” Hyunjin swallowed the lump in his throat and corrected himself. “You are my everything and you broke me, Felix.”

 

 “It was as if you never needed me as much as i needed you.”

 

 “Don’t you dare say that,” Felix’s face hardened but softened instantly to whisper a word that made Hyunjin’s heart crack again.

 

_  Please. _

 

 “I know whatever i say right now won't change the fact that i hurt you, but I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. I wasn’t thinking clearly and i ended up hurting the person that mattered most in my life.” Felix started, his eyes never meeting Hyunjin’s for more than a second. 

 

 “I left because I had to go for rehabilitation.” 

 

 Hyunjin looked up to stare into the orbs he once fell in love with. They were glossed over with tears. Biting his bottom lip raw, Felix continued painfully. 

 

 “My depression was getting out of hand, so i needed to go for camp to help me with it. I didn’t tell you because i didn’t want you to give everything you had going for you up, just for me. I couldn’t do it; I couldn’t do it to the person I love.” Felix used the ends of his hands to grip tightly on the ends of Hyunjin’s denim jacket.

 

 As Felix droned on and on, Hyunjin got lost in the words he was spouting out, regret filling him to the brim. 

 

 Hyunjin wasn't sure if he should have screamed or cried.

 

 “You could have told me. I trusted you to tell me shit like this Felix. We were in a relationship.” 

 

 Hyunjin staggered on his words, unsure of what he should have said next. 

 

 “I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I needed you the most, but i pushed you away. I pushed everyone away to settle my own demons. And when i came back, you were gone. You had moved on  _ without me _ .”

 

 “Who  _ the fuck _ said i moved on?”

 

 It was the straw that broke the camel’s back; the final phrase that broke the dam that was holding Hyunjin’s tears back. 

 

 Felix’s voice, barely over a whisper, muttered out over the music that was thumping rhythmically from downstairs.

 

 “What?”

 

 “Who the fuck said i moved on huh?”

 

 Hyunjin’s voice was raw and scratchy from the tears he had been trying to choke down for the past hour or so. He couldn't breathe. He was one minute away from just collapsing on the floor. His fingernails dug into his palms, leaving crescent mooned marks over the scars that were once healed. 

 

 “I tried. I swear to god Felix i tried so hard you could not believe it. I just couldn't. There was no one else who could compare to you and you know that.”

 

 Blood had begun to form from the amount of force he was using to shock himself into reality. 

 

 “Hyunjin..."

 

 “I can’t believe you didn't trust me enough to tell me this. We really had something special together and you threw it away.”

 

 Hyunjin paused to think for a second, despite the rash insults he had been hurling at Felix for the past minute or so. His fingers moved up to pinch the bridge of his nose as he looked to the ground.

 

 What Felix did make sense though. He was scared and afraid. Depression was no joke, Hyunjin knew. And it was out of good intention. 

 

 Felix had the urge to wipe away the tears that were free falling down Hyunjin’s face, to make everything better and make the pain go away as he did before. But there was nothing he could have done when this time; he was the cause of Hyunjin’s pain. 

 

 The pain etched on his face, and his soul was something that could never be wiped or erased. They would remain there forever. 

 

 “I’m sorry.” 

 

 Felix really was. But Hyunjin was broken beyond repair and Felix’s words did nothing but cause a dull ache to echo in his chest. 

 

 “It’s fine.” 

 

_  It wasn’t. _

 

 Hyunjin reached out to squeeze Felix’s smaller hand briefly before letting go. In the past, it used to ignite sparks and bombs in his chest, eliciting never-ending goosebumps all over his entire body. 

 

 “I’m sorry for not being there for you.”

 

 “And I’m sorry that you didn't trust me enough to tell me about this.”

 

 The roles in their relationship reversed; Hyunjin turned his back on Felix for the first time. 

 

 Would he turn back?


	6. 11.59pm

 

 The clock struck 11.59pm. 

 

 One minute to midnight. 

 

 Hyunjin had a choice. A simple choice, with two very different outcomes that would change his life forever. 

 

 Option one: Grab Felix by the collar of his jacket and kiss him until he stopped breathing altogether. Option two: Turn his back, just like Felix once did and never look back. 

 

 After him and Felix’s tension-filled conversation, the two had stumbled back downstairs one after another. The boy he was dancing with not too long ago had staggered away and was busy dancing with another boy who was much more attractive than Hyunjin, but he didn’t mind- He wasn’t Felix. 

 

 The alcohol had worn off a while ago, after his tear-jerking argument with Felix, he had sobered up quite a bit, but there was still a pounding sensation that reverberated throughout his body. 

 

 It was weighing on him, like a 20-pound sack of rice, crushing him slowly but surely. And there was only one thing that Hyunjin knew could make it go away.

 

 The noise had amplified by the tenfold as the seconds ticked down to the start of 2019. Time was running out and Hyunjin had to make a decision. 

 

 Backing away from all the couples that were gravitating towards each other as the seconds disappeared, Hyunjin bumped into someone. 

 

 “Sorry, I wasn’t looking where i was goin-”

 

_  Felix. _

 “Oh, hey”

 

 “Hyunjin.”

 

 “Don’t you have someone to be with or something?  _ It’s almost midnight. _ ” Hyunjin shifted from side to side. His palms had grown sweaty from the heat, but he refused to take it out from his pockets. 

 

 “Nah, i came with a friend but he’s probably with his girlfriend.” 

 

 “Oh?”

 

 “Yea, oh.”

 

 The countdown had begun. 

 

_  10, 9, 8, _

 

__ “I know i can never say this enough, but I’m sorry.” 

 

 7, 6, 5

 

 “It’s the New Year, it’s time we ought to let it go, Felix. I forgive you.”

 

 It was hard for Hyunjin to utter those words out, but he managed. 

 

 “Yea, it’s the New Year where we can start afresh. Start from the beginning.” 

 

 4, 3, 2

 

 “Sure,  _ friends _ ?” Hyunjin stuck his hand out. 

 

 A painful smile crawled upon Hyunjin’s face. It was as if someone took a knife and gutted him with it. 

 

 But what Felix did next shocked him. 

 

 “No.”

 

_  1 _

 

 Stepping forward, Felix grabbed Hyunjin by the collar of his jacket and kissed him square on the lips just as the clock struck 12. Hyunjin’s eyes bulged out from the initial shock that slapped him across the face, but he slowly recovered and eased into the groove. 

 

 Felix chose for him. Option 1 it was then. But Hyunjin didn’t regret it. Not one bit. 

 

 Oh how he had missed the way Felix’s lips slotted on his. 

 

 Felix’s lips moved slowly against his- they had all the time in the world. Hyunjin took this as an invitation to place a hand on Felix’s hips, while the other rested on his right cheek. It was just like before.

 

 The kiss started out slow at first, and the two just took their time to really hold each other. They had all the time in the world anyway. 

 

 When Hyunjin opened his eyes again, there were streamers in Felix’s blond hair. 

 

 Hyunjin began to unconsciously pick some of them out with his deft fingers, loving the way his soft tendrils brushed against the skin of his fingertips. 

 

 “I just kissed the life out of you after 6 months and you’re picking streamers out of my hair?” 

 

 “Of course, that’s what friends do. Right?”

 

 Felix laughed softly, a sound that Hyunjin was happy to hear again. Picking out the last of the streamers out of Felix’s hair, Hyunjin exhaled after an eternity. 

 

 “Happy New Year Felix.” 

 

 “Happy New Year to you Hyunjin.” 


End file.
